Feeling alone

I've been isolated from the world, and confused about what exactly i want. Life is like a train when its working; it's a full steam ahead locomotive which can't be stopped, yet when its broken down the tracks  seem to be broke constantly. Sometimes its not about knowing what you want especially when your mind changes on a daily basis. I think maybe  uncertainty is a sign that i should look for something else in my life to find meaning.
          When you have a relationship with someone theres only two options when things go bad, making up, or breaking up. If you choose to breakup theres two ways you can handle the situation. One person will want to fix things and say, " baby i love you we can get through this". However, the Other person will try to play things off completly aloof as if the relationship wasn't even a big deal in the first place, they will forget your number, and forget they ever knew you. I acted like i didn't care, but karma came back to get me becuase six monthes later i was the one crying and she had already moved on. Stuff like this is what makes it scary to be alone, and scary to bring things to an end, but i screw it becuase i refuse to live life wondering "what if".